Repeat after me, I will respect other people’s choices

Photo by FotoRita

Photo by FotoRita

No offense to the veggies either.  I had the most disturbing conversation with my friend.  She was telling me that our third friend had just gone back to work after her three months maternity leave ended and was finding work really hard and quite stressful to be back.  Personally I think she’s a hero and imagine how heartbreaking it must be to leave your three month old to go back to work.  The disturbing part was what my friend said her exact words were “Think about it, you’re a mother, a house wife, and your husband is 70% not home you might turn crazy in a while,in this case you don’t have anything to improve/develop thinking and knowledge in life.”

I am a little crazy, I am a mother, I am a housewife (well not the best but I am OK) but I get to improve and develop my knowledge each and every day.  I resent the implication that if a woman does not go out and work that makes her less of a woman.  At the same time I also hate the implication that a mother who chooses to go back to work makes her less of a mother.  The stay at home mom vs the working mom is an age old argument and each side thinks that their position is better than the other.

Everyone lives a different life, everyone is entitled to their choices and those choices should be respected.  I probably took the discussion to personally, but what in life isn’t personal.  Before you blurt out something judgmental think for a moment, if you were in that persons shoes what would you do, why do you think that person made that choice?  Sometimes we don’t always have the luxury of doing what makes us happiest or the best or optimum solution but that does not make us bad people.

Walk a mile in my shoes and your feet will hurt.

8 Comments

  • At 2008.11.11 12:53, RJay said:

    i love that we always have the either or arguments work or not work , to diet or love urself , to marry early or wait

    why oh why do we do this to ourselves u might WANT one thing but ur circumstances and personality make u walk a different path id love to be a stay at home rich mom that shops all day has nannies travels the world reads books and plays with the kids and has a killer body coz she has time to go to the gym and money for lipos uction heheh

    anyways the point is although i wld have liked to be married at 16 im 25 i work a 9 to five job im simgle dont have kids and my travels are quite limited :-) so i think we shld stop judging and stick to our own shoes and respect everyone elses :-)

    • At 2008.11.11 13:34, wonders said:

      some people have their finger in their eye and cannot see past it.

      • At 2008.11.11 13:53, gjoez said:

        Do you know that this was exactly what I wanted to write on the Kollena Laila day?

        Exactly using those words!

        I can see we are on the same page when it gets to women working and housewives and all that!

        • At 2008.11.11 14:44, inas said:

          i really like the post every one is different and every one is only one capable of making his own chice fullstop.

          • At 2008.11.11 15:34, mona said:

            Really good post. I completely agree, the “Mom wars” is really ridiculous. Each of us do the best we can and everyone has to make the choice that is best for them and their family, without looking down on anyone else. We are all Moms after all.

            • At 2008.11.11 15:36, mona said:

              By the way, I’m weird but that picture, to me it looks like a man trying to stuff his feet into a woman’s shoe (manish hands too) Now that’s an argument I can get behind.
              There’s an old saying :
              “Man works from sun to sun, but woman’s work is never done”

              • At 2008.11.12 19:48, insomniac said:

                reading this, i couldn’t help but smile :)

                reminded me of something i wrote baaaaaaaaaack in my old blog! would have sent it to u if i still had it… touche

                that being said, ppl never fail to find something to critisize, so just eshtery demaghek and do what makes you and your family happy :)

                • At 2008.11.16 12:27, jessyz said:

                  @RJay: I hope you get to be a rich yummy mummy
                  @wonders: hehehe that is so funny
                  @gjoez: great minds think alike.
                  @mona: this is the first time I’ve heard that saying and it is soooo true.
                  @insomniac: matab3an ana sharya dema3’i we menafada 3ala ra2y tante mamet gjoez. It’s just that I wish people would mind their own business and be slightly more sensitive.