Catty and Critical

My wonderful and amazing sister was telling me about the book “Make Every Man Want You (or Make yours want you more)” by Marie Forleo and especially about the following chapter:

Many women find it challenging to acknowledge and compliment other irresistible women, especially while in the presence of their man. Insecure women will criticize another woman’s clothing, shoes, bag, hair, body, makeup, or success. These catty and critical women mistakenly believe that tearing down another; irresistible woman will somehow be a preemptive strike and prevent their man from finding the other woman desirable. Nothing could be farther from the truth!
First of all, being critical of another woman casts you in a bad light. You are seen as insecure and jealous. And let’s be honest, your man probably noticed her at least ten minutes before you did, so why pretend otherwise?
Here’s the other thing. By bad-mouthing attractive women, you unconsciously program yourself not to become one. The universe is like a big photocopy machine that sends back to you copies of what you “order” through your thoughts. By being catty and critical, your thoughts are sending “attractive is bad” out to the universe, and the universe has no choice but to say, “Yes, master! Attractive is .” Because none of us wants to be bad, we will not allow ourselves to become attractive or, heaven forbid, irresistible.
Here’s what to do. When you notice another hot woman, silently bless her and say, “That’s right, girl. W-o-r-k!” This will recondition your mind to approve of being attractive, and the universe has no choice but to say, “Yes, master!” and support you in being as foxy as you want to be. Personally, I like to point out attractive women so both my partner and I can enjoy the eye candy. It is fun and supports honesty between us, and the bottom line is that he’s coming home with me.

I actually saw the light bulb go off in my head when she told me about it.  It was not just about attractiveness, but about anything and everything  you wish you had more of.

Disclaimer : From the reviews and what my sisters said, this isn’t a book about doing stuff or following rules for men to want you but more about loving yourself and enjoying yourself so your man will love you more.  It’s not about dating but about reality and relationships.


  • At 2010.04.23 01:03, Ana said:

    I don’t agree with discussing attractiveness elements of other women, because simply men are ordered to lower their gaze…I won’t be encouraging it, but rather pointing out it’s haram to do so…and I do agree I should learn how to be attractive the way my man prefers, indirectly.

    I hope you get where I am coming from :)

    • At 2010.05.03 15:58, jessyz said:

      I am not encouraging men to look either. I just posted the excerpt as is. I wouldn’t point out pretty women to my husband either and not just because it is harraam :-).

      • At 2010.04.23 01:31, ibhog said:

        about successful people too!

        that was a very interesting excerpt, thanks for sharing :)

        • At 2010.05.03 15:59, jessyz said:

          You are welcome.