Yes, I confess, I am a hair monster. I treat my hair really badly with the conviction that hair eventually grows out or back. A word of advice, it grows yes that is true but it also gets angry and starts doing weird things if you abuse it way too much. Over the years I have done some really bad bad things to my hair.
The Mullet
The mullet was not my idea, the mullet could not have been prevented. In a sad sad summer, the summer when my parents sent us to Egypt and my mom was in China and my dad was in Scotland my sister and I were left with my grandmother. My grandmother is a wonderful lady, she really is, her only problem was that she had this weird idea that a mullet cut would a) look good on us. b) would be more manageable. Unfortunately she was wrong on both counts. My sister had it even worse. I would love to show you pictures but since we are both veiled now I can’t, plus I think my sister burned all evidence of that time. Seriously mullets suck and are a pain in the neck to grow out.
Sheen
Sheen was so wrong. Imagine Black Henna married to a regular perm. First of all it smells really strong and its application is torture you have to keep it on your hair for six hour so we would just apply it and wear a plastic shower cap and use an old pillow case on the pillows and fall asleep. Falling asleep with smelly goo on your head is not a good idea. Then you have to wash it off in the morning. Washing it out was a pain too. It’s like washing sticky sand out of your hair. The effect is straight jet black hair. It was awesome on my mom’s hair, who has naturally jet black hair. On my sister and I it looked wrong, my sister is a red head and I am a brunette so we just looked like Adam’s Family Halloween costumes gone wrong. What I hated the most was how the ends looked, they looked like pins sticking out.
Home Hair Dye
I dye my hair at home because I am lazy and a little bit cheap and usually really bored. I get bored with my hairon a, my husband doesn’t like short hair so I decide to dye it. That’s what happens. I am good at the application and it turns out looking really nice, but boy does hair dye dry your hair. Everytime I tell myself I am not going to do it again but I can’t help myself.
Diet Pepsi
Yes, I once poured half a can of diet pepsi on my hair. Why? Because we were at the beach and my friends were talking about how beer supposedly gives you that sun kissed bleached hair. Since I don’t drink and won’t buy beer because of Religious reasons I thought I drink Diet Pepsi, maybe that would work on my hair. I am not sure if it did or if it was the acid or because I slept for a couple of hours in the sun but my hair did get a shade lighter. Brutal aren’t I?
Soap and Water
Have you ever washed your hair with hand soap? Don’t, your hair will not forgive you easily. There were times when I’d relalize too late that we just ran out of shampoo and I’d just wash my hair anyway with shower gel or regular soap. Thankfully that doesn’t happen anymore because my husband and I buy too much shampoo and there is usually a bottle of baby shampoo too. The odds of running out of three types of shampoo at the same time are not against my hair. I love baby shampoo. It smells so clean and fresh. I also use the stuff for bubble baths for Lulu because it doesn’t hurt her eyes when she puts her face in the water to eat the bubbles. Although if you do have an all natural organic olive oil soap bar, then by all means do try washing your hair with it, your hair will thank you. Seriously, Olive Oil soap is just like magic.
I have done some good things to my hair too, they’re just not as many as the no-nos. Like last year I tried the Brazillian Blow Dry Keratin thing. At first I didn’t see a difference but then I realized that my hair was not as frizzy as it used to be and it was noticeably more manageable. I also went through a phase of deep conditioning because I bought a jar of beautifully smelling deep shea butter conditioner, unfortunately I can’t find the stuff again. I also tried the conditioner only cleaning method which was also really nice to my hair. You wash your hair with conditioner only, no shampoo. You need to use the cheaper kinds of conditioner because they are lighter and work better in this method.
What is the worst thing you have done to your hair?
