Exactly 2 years today I woke up at 9 am feeling tired and in pain. I got ready to go out to breakfast. I was in Egypt and my husband was on vacation with me and was going to take me out to breakfast then drop me off at work. Instead I went to the hospital, had an emergency C-section and met Lulu for the first time at around 6 pm. That was when my whole life changed. Two years have gone by really quickly. I read somewhere that the days are really slow but the years go by really fast. That is exactly who I feel right now.
She was born with jet black hair, dimples and(which are gone except when she grins really hard) two birthmarks one on each thigh. She was also born with a very interesting personality. She is determined, curious, talkative and bubbly. She was wrapped in her baby blanket and an outfit I had picked out with my husband months earlier. She was much smaller than I thought babies should be. She didn’t do anything except sleep, eat, poop and cry for the first couple of months. I didn’t do anything except feed, wash away all the poop and cry while dreaming of sleep (just kidding it wasn’t that bad, but I still do dream of sleep). We decided to be friends. She didn’t ask and I didn’t offer but I think I am determined to be friends anyways. It is still a long journey but I am grateful.
With out current monkey obsession (diapers and crochet monkeys) which was probably caused by watching too much Curious George, I felt that a monkey cake was the perfect gift. I wasn’t planning on having a party anyways. My husband and I were planning to celebrate quietly just the two of us at home with a cake and a gift. When my sister in law said she was going to drop by Friday and celebrate with us we decided to make pizza as well and get balloons as well. She loved the cake and woke up this morning asking for monkey ‘tata’ which is Lulu speak for chocolate. And she spent 10 minutes pointing at it and saying monkey monkey when she first saw it. I baked it Thursday morning while she was out at daycare and hid it in the top utility drawer so she wouldn’t see it. I also made rolling fondant for the very first time and tried a new chocolate frosting recipe because the one I love uses chocolate chips and I didn’t have any. The fondant was much easier to make than I thought and turned out beautifully. The whole cake was a success. It took about an hour and a half from start to finish including baking and decorating so I guess it was easier than I thought it would be.
Lessons learned when making monkey cake:
Make sure you have all the ingredients.
Wash the dishes as soon as you are done with them. Chocolate, butter and marshmallows are not easy to wash off when they’ve dried onto your bowls.
Be confident when rolling fondant, if you don’t like what you have you can always start all over.
I think the next time I make this I would probably make the frosting the first thing and I would use my chocolate chip recipe. It usually needs to sit in the fridge for an hour or two but it tastes better and its texture is way better.
Do not lick too much batter.
Take lots of pictures. It is a fun process.
Write down your favorite recipes. I send most recipes to my email but still lose them sometimes, so I have a notebook filled with successful tried and tested ones. I also write down a recipe on large post its and stick them on the wall while I am cooking so I don’t have to look for it while my hands are all covered in sticky stuff. If a recipe passes the test it gets copied into the notebook.
Make sure you have a serving plate that fits. Unfortunately I didn’t the ears make the shape of this cake difficult to fit on a regular plate so I just covered a try in foil. Next time I would probably cut out a peice of cardboard and cover that in foil and then in pieces of wax paper so I can just pull them from under the cake when I am done so the whole thing would look cleaner. I know it does not matter but I really care about presentation. I tried to tissue off excess frosting but it still looked a bit messy.
I have an awesome cake recipe but I was afraid that I would not have enough time so I opted to use cake mix (Betty Crocker’s Chocolate Fudge Cake) to be honest I think my cake is better and next time I probably would just use the recipe but it still was a wonderful cake, so don’t be afraid to take shortcuts and use a little bit of extra help.
It is best to do this while little people under 5 are out of the house or at least busy doing something else.
Lessons learned when having little Lulus (who sometimes behave like little monkeys)
Sometimes you have to remind yourself that you are in control. I sometimes need to tell her in a loud clear voice “I am your mommy, you are my daughter, I am in charge”.
Making a fool of yourself in a public place to make your daughter laugh is totally underrated, everyone should do it at least once a month. It is liberating to act the way you really want to as if no one else existed and it is fun too. Kids are a great excuse for that.
It is sometimes really hard deciding what is best for your kid. Keep trying.
It is sometimes really hard doing what is best for your kid. Try harder.
Sticking to what you have decided and started doing is even harder. Keep trying harder.
Keep track of milestones, if a child is very late at reaching one, go see a doctor.
It is always OK to seek a second opinion especially concerning doctors. Sometimes it is even critical.
ALWAYS find a little bit time for yourself. There is an Arabic proverb that say, he who does not have something can not give it (فاقد الشيئ لا يعطيه) so in other words a mother who is not happy and healthy can not raise happy and healthy children.
Finally, it is never really a destination with kids, it is a journey, so make sure you pack lots of snacks, diapers, books, pain relievers and a positive attitude.
Happy birthday to you Lulu and happy giving birth day to me too.
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Yes, it is true. I got this book as an audio book and listened to it while running errands. If you saw a grown woman driving her toddler around and laughing like a loon then you saw me while I was listening to it. Written by Robert Fulghum, it is absolutely a wonderful read/listen to. It was just what I needed to hear. Funny, deep, profound and totally true; his ideas were like a breath of fresh air. All I need to know I learned in Kindergarten was first published in 1986, but its wisdom is timeless and Fulghum does a great job of telling it like it is in a way even children in Kindergarten would understand it and appreciate it. The book contains fifty short essays, ranging in length from approximately 200 to approximately 1,000 words, which are ruminations on topics ranging from surprises, holidays, childhood, death, and the lives of interesting people including Mother Teresa. In his introduction, Fulghum describes these as having been “written over many years and addressed to friends, family, a religious community, and myself, with no thought of publication in book form.” One of my favorite essays is the one about crayons. He talks about how a box of crayons (I love crayons) makes adults and children alike giddy with happiness.
Maybe we should develop a Crayola bomb as our next secret weapon. A happiness weapon. A Beauty Bomb. And every time a crisis developed, we would launch one. It would explode high in the air — explode softly — and send thousands, millions, of little parachutes into the air. Floating down to earth — boxes of Crayolas. And we wouldn’t go cheap either — not little boxes of eight. Boxes of sixty-four, with the sharpener built right in. With silver and gold and copper, magenta and peace and lime, amber and umber and all the rest. And people would smile and get a little funny look on their faces and cover the world with imagination instead of death. A child who touched one wouldn’t have his hand blown off. [from the book]
I am definitely going to buy this book give them away as gifts to friends and loved ones. We all need innocent childlike curiosity and cheer in our lives.
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An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in, a pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves and a realist doesn’t need to stay up because he knows that the old year will leave and the new year will start.
Almost everyone and their brother has a 2008 roundup of events post, a bye bye 2008 post, you suck 2008 post or a hello 2009 post. I keep thinking what was 2008 to me and then I realize right now my milestones are monthly and the month starts on the 20th in reference to my daughter’s birth date. It’s not that I think my life started when she was born or that it ended for that matter, it is just an easier milestone to follow. I am just counting baby milestones and encouraging, nourishing and teaching her new tricks. The outside world exists and matters and 2009 will start tonight whether I like it or not. I don’t make new year’s resolutions because I make them every night, I try to think of the day and think of what I could have done better and resolve to do more of it or less of the things I should not have done. Some days I am just glad the day is over and that the next will be a fresh start. Instead of resolutions I am sharing my wishes for 2009.
I wish 2009 will be a good year for everyone. I wish everyone would think before they acted and choose to do the good thing.
I wish 2009 will be a right year for everyone. I wish everyone would think before they acted and choose to do the right thing.
I wish 2009 will be a green year and that everyone will try to be more environmentally friendly because we don’t want to live in a polluted ugly world.
I wish 2009 will be a caring year. That everyone will go the extra mile for the people they care for and will pick up the phone and call their loved ones and let them know they care.
I wish 2009 will be a conscientious year. Listen to your conscience it might tell you what you need to do.
I wish 2009 will be a humane year.
I wish 2009 will be a beautiful year for everyone. Make an effort to bring beauty into your lives.
I wish 2009 will be a forgiving year for everyone. That it might forgive us for our mistakes in 2008 and that we forgive those who have wronged us.
I wish 2009 will be a patient year for everyone. Patience for our shortcomings and those around us.
I wish 2009 will be a positive year for everyone. Positivity is what helps us keep going.
I wish 2009 will be a hopeful year for everyone. Hope for a better future. Hope that you can change the world even if it will take one small step at a time.
I wish 2009 will be a year of change for everyone. Change bad habits into better ones.
I wish 2009 will be a year of health for everyone.
I wish 2009 will be a productive year for everyone. Work hard, play well and enjoy life.
I wish 2009 will be a year of growth for everyone. Grow old gracefully, grow emotionally, mentally and financially. For those little ones may you grow taller and stronger each day.
I wish 2009 will be a educational year for everyone. Learn from your mistakes and move on. Take that language course or a pottery class. Learn a new word every day.
Motherhood is an awesome thing, really, it is. Having a baby changes everything, really, it does. There were so many things I took for granted before I had my daughter. I sometimes miss them but sometimes I’m too sleep deprived and totally numb to care.
Sleeping in. Sleeping in general takes a back seat to caring for a baby. They wake up at night and need stuff like nursing, diaper changes or just a cuddle. I sometimes am amazed how my body can sometimes manage on a couple of hours of sleep for days.
Going out in 5 minutes. Now it takes 45 minutes. Change diaper, feed baby, make sure diaper bag has everything, change clothes, comb hair (I guess this is why bald babies need less time to go out), change diaper again, find the missing hair clip, comb hair again, find missing sock under the sofa, put on said sock and shoes, find keys, find wallet, find cell phone. Mommy then needs to get into clean clothes and we can leave the house. In the car you need another 10 minutes to put baby in the car seat especially if said baby has learned how to wiggle out of the harness.
Going wherever you want. I haven’t been to the movies in 10 months. I really would love to see a movie, but I don’t want to annoy everyone else with a crying baby and I don’t want to have to get up and take her our if she cries and miss all of the nice bits in the movie. God bless DVDs.
Traveling light. Diaper bag, mommy bag, toys, food, stroller and that’s only what you need for a quick pop to the shops.
Being selfish. Yes, being selfish was fun.
Me time. Just sitting and chilling out is something I miss. Babies seem to have this internal system that lets them know when you need to relax and they suddenly need to play and make a mess.
Manicures and pedicures. I still occasionally manage to go and get one but they are very few and far between.
Clutter free living. I have two toy boxes (well one box and one big fish looking bucket) but still some toys find their way under the coffee table, in our bed and in the kitchen. I make a big deal of teaching my daughter that the toys need to sleep in their boxes hopefully that one day she will learn to do it herself.
Getting sick. Getting sick is a luxury because who will do all of the things mommy does for baby? Once I figure out who can do them I will get sick.
Driving recklessly. Driving was something I never imagined would have changed because I am more or less a safe driver but now I drive much slower and always feel like I need to be extra careful.
On a more positive note, I get to watch lots of Sesame Street.
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What do you think?
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If you could go back and change an action in your life would you choose to do that? Here’s the catch, if you choose to go back you have to go through your life all over again taking the risk that whatever you change might change everything else that came after that event. Years ago I read a book called Replay, by Ken Grimwood. Jeff Winston the protagonist a 43 year old radio journalist dies and wakes up 18 years old again, he gets to redo his life while still remembering his old life. He gets to “replay” his life several times at different ages too each time starting older than the one before. He memorizes airplane crashes, stocks, tries to save a friend from suicide and things like that. The book was one of the most insightful books I have ever read. I would love to re-read it now and see how I would feel about it.
I used to believe that if you make your own decisions you should have no regrets and that even if you think you made a mistake you should be proud of it, make it right and move on. I remember having this discussion when I was 23 with someone at work who was 10 years older and he said that he used to think so too and that when you get older you do have regrets even if they are small ones or trivial ones. I think now I sort of agree but I still think that if you hold yourself accountable for your decisions you should not have many regrets just perhaps nostalgia for what should or could have been.
“Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable.” Harris, Sidney J.
Would you want a do over? What would you redo? Would it be worth the risk?
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No managers, just one very bossy baby.
There are no deadlines, just one ongoing very long day trying to finish all of your small tasks
There is no competition, there can only be one mommy, so you are always employee of the month.
Even diaper changing can be fun if you make it game like. Baby hold clean nappy, baby hold diaper cream, baby chew on clean nappy, baby lift your legs up, lots of tickles and presto it is fun!
Every day is casual Thursday, I could wear a clown suit and no one would care except the baby and I think she might find it funny.
Dancing and singing off tune is acceptable and is very appreciated.
You can take naps, that is when and if the baby decides to take one.
Playing tickle monster all day.
Playing hairdresser with the baby’s hair and trying out different do’s all day long.
And the top ten reason is that you are payed in smiles and giggles.
Yes it is exhausting, yes sometimes I feel like poking my own eardrums when she’s having a cry fest for no apparent reason but it is always rewarding. It is an enjoyable journey and I have big plans. The process of learning together and seeing the world through little Miss Wiggly Bottom’s eyes is just more than anything I had ever expected.