Socks and holding on to stuff {Wednesday’s WIPs}

IMG_1553The socks are my only current WIP (work in progress).  I managed to finish up everything else and trying to work at one thing at  a time.  They are for my daughter, she asked for them.  The yarn is Knitpicks Felici and I had two balls of this colorway, my last two and since Felici has been discontinued I was hoarding them.  For some reason I decided to use them.  I have been decluttering all month, using the Konmari method from the book “The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up” by Japanese author Marie Kondo.  The secret to her method is to only keep what truly brings you joy.  Own only what you truly love and cherish and it will be enough. 

I had already gotten rid of most of my yarn stash, all of the things I didn’t like got sent away to the charity place.  Even my extra needles and hooks were sent.  All that is left is yarn that I really like, that truly brings joy, so it did not make sense to save it anymore.  I bought it to use it, so I might as well just do it. 

I thought that I got rid of things easily, and in general I do.  I try not to attach sentimental value to objects and things.  I try to keep attachment in general to a minimum.  But sometimes some items slip by.  When I was tidying up, I found movie ticket stubs to when my husband and I first got married.  I found notes we had written to each other.  Forgotten at the back of drawers.  So why had I held onto them?  Why was it hard to throw them away?  Maybe deep down we feel that these things become talismans of happy memories.

Marie explains why we don’t get rid of things “But when we really delve into the reasons for why we can’t let something go, there are only two: an attachment to the past or a fear for the future.”  And to drive the point home she also wrote “Truly precious memories will never vanish even if you discard the objects associated with them.” and “It is not our memories but the person we have become because of those past experiences that we should treasure.

She is right.  The memories didn’t go away when I got rid of the stuff, the preciousness of the beautiful moments that I was tried to preserve did not fade away.  Symbolically, to me personally, it felt that I should work harder on making more beautiful memories with the people I care about instead of trying to find mementos to preserve old memories with them.  It works for the yarn too.  Yes it will probably be the last time I will enjoy the yarn, but the socks will last longer, well maybe not for the 7 year old, who grows out of her socks in the blink of an eye. But the enjoyment of knitting them and seeing her wear them for some time is much greater than the yarn being left forgotten in the bottom of my yarn basket.  There will always be more yarn and more beautiful memories, I just need to remember to make a conscious decision of choosing the joy of experience over the joy of possession.

 

Inner dialogues

I had an epiphany this morning. The difference between a happy life and a miserable one is design. If you live a life of surrender to the status quo you can not be happy. Happy people actively seek and design lives they are comfortable with. They fill their homes with flowers and pretty things that make them happy. They find jobs that work for them and if they don’t they design an environment around them that are happy. They enjoy their meals and only eat food that nourishes their bodies and souls. They are proactive, assertive and positive. This doesn’t mean you need to change your life. You just need to design it in a way that makes you happy. If you watch a couple getting married (in the Middle East), they spend months organizing a wedding and decorating their apartment. Most of it is done for the benefit of others, to impress other people or to assert their social status. But then after that they stop the design process. They have kids because it is expected of them. They settle down to a life they might not want or yearn for because they stopped making it their own lives. They just go with the flow. I am not against going with the flow, but there is a huge difference between accepting and adapting to life’s blows and just being defeated. Almost every Egyptian home has a room usually called the Salon. It is a whole room that is dressed up to the nines and probably used twice in a lifetime. That doesn’t make sense, design wise. It is a waste of space and money. Space that could be better utilized for the family actually living in that home. That is exactly what happens when you design your life badly. You have wasted space. Valuable real estate in your life or time that should be used better. My mother’s grandmother used to say there is no poverty just lack of good opinion. ما فيش فقر في قلة رأي.
Whatever your resources are, proper management they can be more efficiently and effectively used.